Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips..

everyone just wants to watch you burn and crash
but we will show them, wont we?
youre just a posterboy for humanity
all walk and no talk of happiness
but i see the cracks in the mirror
worry lines deeper than laugh lines
i am a palm reader and my bachelors in the gutter
"oh how your eyes sparkle..."
throw in your two weeks notice
re-construction of everything you ever held dear
told to chasing cars in reverse on a highway...
(youre just fucking roadkill, kid.)
parents put you under home arrest on friday nights...
(youre just fucking buzzkill, kid!)
lovemaking in cuffs reminds you of nights with razors to your wrists...
(youre just fucking bonerkill, kid!!!)
inject me
i hate being loved
i want to be condemned
treat me like a monster
(its all i deserve)

I AM FALLING APART

and i find it kinda funny in that this isnt a plea for attention, its just to let you know i am beginning to accept my fate.

in other news i have found someone else- rather than you- to obsess over. its someone just as messed up as i am. we sorta just hang and talk about our personality flaws and how we are in love with them. its great. actually its amazing. i just gotta bite the bullet and share the inside of my head/heart/guts. and hopefully this time when i (eventually) get rejected, the carpet of self-confidence wont get ripped out from under my feet so hard this time. you made me eat the pavement.

but i thank you; you made me who i am today. i am over it and moving on.
are you proud of me?